Less of April...

I broke with my boyfriend the other night. Yep. I’ve had a boyfriend. For the past 10 months I’ve been dating someone.  On paper, and in theory, he was it.  I wanted smart.  He is smart. I wanted someone who was successful. He is successful. I wanted someone handsome.   He’s handsome. I wanted someone who was nice/kind. He’s nice/kind.   I also wanted someone who was funny.   Well…fail on that. He’s NOT funny. (Red Flag) But I figured that because I’m funny, we’d laugh at the shit I said. And we did.   Trust me when I tell you that I have the enviable ability to be funny for several people at once.  Anthony--- not his real name but we have to call him something-- and I met online.  He was a welcomed change to the derelicts that had approached me. His note to me was clever and smart and articulate. While he lived in the ‘burbs, he worked not too far from where I worked. From the moment we met I just felt as though it was wrong. ...

This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill Fifteen percent concentrated power of will Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain And a hundred percent reason to remember the name! – Fort Minor “Remember the Name” 27 days out… The weeks since my surgery seemed to have flown by. I am in the pureed stage and am approaching the solid food stage.   To be honest, the pureed stage has been disgusting. Like my friend said to me today, mush is mush. Boy is it ever!  I won’t lie kids; this past week has been rough.   I got my period January 2 nd and have only lost 2lbs since then.   Please do not get me started on the fact that I got my period a week early and it’s been dragging on for 7 days, with no end in sight.   Being  41 currently sucks ass and can move on to sucking all the dicks.   I’m beyond frustrated by this. I was loosing weight really quickly and it was exciting.  However, I am happy to share that  a s I t...