The Moment We were in my kitchen. Kissing. Loving. Touching…everywhere. My back against the wall. You pressed against me. I was feeling… Consumed. High. Overwhelmed. Wanton. Humiliated. Overcome. Engulfed. Hazy. Confused. Elated. Conflicted. Sentenced. Energized. Hot. Enraged. Angry. Happy. Cold. Sad. Defeated. Loved. Wet. Discarded. Wanted. Replaceable. Crazy. I wanted you. I loved you. I hated you. What did you do to me? How did this happen? What did I do to myself? Can I get rid of you like that old coat? But it still fits. Never mind about the tear in the sleeve. Don’t look at the missing buttons. How can I look you and tell you to leave? Would it help if I hit you? Maybe. So I do. HARD. With feeling. With all the energy that comes from 12 years of frustration. You liked it for a second. Thought it was one our games. The look on your face when you realized I MEANT it. I WANTED to hurt you. Maybe make you feel how I have felt. I wanted to kill...
This is the journey of me...I am on a quest to change just about every thing about my life. Your guess is as good as mine, as to how it will all play out!