Less of April...

July 31, 2009 The other day I went to an informational session on bariatric surgery. First off, there is nothing, and I do mean nothing, that is sadder than a room full of fatties looking for THE ANSWER. People are fat. I watched as people struggled to wedge themselves into seats. Several of the attendees where visibly uncomfortable and clearly had issues breathing. Young looking people with canes, I heard some one talking about having numbness in their legs and feet. And superficially, I just was struck with how bad people looked. I do my best to look good every single day. Make up—done! Hair—done! Clothes—cute (and more importantly clean and pressed—there is nothing NOTHING worse than a fatty with food stains on their clothing. It is almost as if when you get to a certain size, you just stop caring. I hope to God that I NEVER get like that. I wish desperately that I wasn’t considering this. But I am. Whatever zest I ever had for weight loss has zoomed ...

Random Hair thoughts: I am obsessed with my hair. My hair is curly. If you follow curly hair it’s type 3c. If you are a person who has grown up with hair issues, you will feel my pain. My hair has been: Dried Fried Dyed Parted to the side and then some. Basically it has been a hot mess. I’ve done so many things to my hair that I should not have and am currently suffering for it. I did the BC last month and am working on growing it out.

Not than any one is paying attention. That was not the point of this exercise.  But I feel like such the looser. No blogging. No journaling. No WW-ing. No nothing. Just me. Eating. Why? I honestly think that I'm hungry. I mean I feel like eating so that's what I've been doing.  Eating. Eating anything. Everything. All the time. I think about food often. Sigh.   I took some time alone the other day and wrote down some thoughts... which I would share, if I weren’t such a disorganized mess. Basically, I'm thinking of getting lap band surgery. I feel as though I am at an impasse. I want o loose weight but I can't seem to get it together long enough to make it happen.  I have an appointment at a LBS clinic this coming week and I am going to go.  I've made this appointment in the past and have bailed out.   This time, promising my self that I am going to go and at least hear what they have to say.  I don't HAVE to DO anything. I just have to listen.   I di...